Saturday, January 31, 2009

Let's Bowl...Let's Bowl...Let's Rock and Roll...

I am not the greatest of bowlers. It's more like gutterballs all the way, with the occasional pin here and there. I don't really take myself seriously! I would just like to know where are the stunt balls that they used in Grease 2? They made it look so easy...they swing their arm, ball in hand, all the way around and then throw it down the lane and a strike soon follows. And, to top it all off, they are singing and dancing down the lane! Bowling in real life isn't that easy.

First, the balls are not stunts! It should be an easy task to find the perfect ball, but it is more difficult than it appears! I had a list of qualifications for my ball: 1) It had to be pretty. 2) It needed to be as light as possible. 3) It needed to have holes that my fingers didn't get stuck in! I thought I had found such a ball, so I proceed to go to my lane and send the ball down toward the pins, or the gutter in my case. :) After about three or four frames, my thumb was killing me! I have been injured, injured bad!!!! Bowling should not leave you with bruises. It is NOT a contact sport! What is up with that?! Needless to say, I gave up on putting my fingers in the holes and proceeded to granny bowl, sit on the floor and kick it down with my feet, and any other way I could think of. Surprisingly, I got more pins down when I sat on the floor and kicked it than I did any other way!

Second, you and those around you do not break out into a musical number while bowling! Seriously, if I had started walking toward the lane and started in with, "Let's Bowl, let's bowl, let's rock and roll...hey, c'mon let's get this show on the road..." the people in the place would have looked at me like I had lost my mind! I think I would have done a much better job if I had been singing while bowling! I'm just sayin!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Fat Girl in a Little Coat

In Georgia, snow doesn't come in massive quantities. OK, it rarely comes at all! SO, when you get the opportunity to go snow tubing on real snow AND you don't have to leave the state to do it, you should jump on that opportunity! That is exactly what I did! They have turned Stone Mountain into Snow Mountain for the next 12 weeks, so my friends and I decide that we will partake in the fun! Yeah, so we pick the coldest night of the year to head out and brave the "slopes"! What were we thinking???? All we knew was layer, layer, layer!

So, me being me, I'm concerned about being fashion conscious while being warm. As I began planning my outfit, I realized that my little knit gloves weren't going to cut it and I needed a hat and earwarmers! What does a girl in my situation do, she goes to the closest sporting goods store to find these fine necessities of life. Keep in mind, that I needed these items to compliment the rest of the outfit! Not an easy task, I must say! After 30 minutes of wandering through the local sporting goods store, I had items checked off my list! Gloves, check; cute hat, check; earwarmes, check; thermals, check check. For the lower half of my body, I had thermals, jeans, and two pairs of thick socks. For the upper portion, I was donning a lovely cami, the thermal shirt, my Bon Jovi longsleeved pink tee- a girl hittin' the snow needs a little Jon Bon for the ride ;-), a mossy green GAP hoodie with GAP stitched in a deep Eggplant purple and outlined in pink (the perfect compliment to my pink tee underneath), a brown and pink hat, and cream earwarmers and scarf. I was prepared...so I thought!

Then a friend called, and began telling me about her experience snow tubing and said I may need to rethink my layers. She said I needed waterproof pants and a ski jacket. Ski jacket, I had and it (shock of all shocks) complimented the outfit quite nicely. Waterproof pants???? Seriously, that was gonna kill the whole look I had going! Unfortunately, I had none and time was short, so that was not an option for me. I then come up with the brilliant plan of rain boots! OK, maybe not the best plan, but I've been wanting some for a while and what better reason than this to purchase them??? So, after layering up and heading out, I stop by Target to check out these rain boots. As luck would have it, there were none in my size...all 9s and 10s. It was a sad day. However, as I was exiting the shoe section, I saw fleece pullovers on clearance! SCORE!!!!! I promptly found a pink fleece and dashed to the checkout lane. Now, I was ready to hit the snow!

When we make it to Stone Mountain, the sun had set and it was getting colder...nearing 20 degrees. Thankfully, one of my friends brought extra ski gear and had some waterproof pants I could put over my jeans! Yeah so they didn't go with the out fit, but when I describe to you how I looked, you will see why I suddenly didn't care. As we sat there preparing to hit the snow, I realized that I needed to add another layer to the upper body. Here is how it went: cami, thermal, longsleeved BonJovi tee, pink fleece (the one I just purchased at Target), GAP hoodie, cream ski jacket, cream coat, cream scarf, the earwarmers, and hat. Picture all of this on one girl...that's all I'm sayin'! Once the coat was on, you couldn't see anything I had on under it!

I felt like, "fat man in a little coat." NO LIE!!!! I wasn't cold, though! The snow tubing was great and I was very thankful for all layers, even if they didn't all coordinate with my original outfit!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

If 2008 was supposed to be the year of change, what does that make 2009?

When we entered 2008, people kept telling me it was the year of change. So, I anxiously awaited these BIG changes that were said to be headed my way in the year to come. To me, big changes meant life-altering changes. As the year came to an end, I reflected back and there were no life-altering changes, just normal every day life changes...I moved to a new apartment, began dating someone...heartache soon followed, tried new things like hanggliding (so gonna go again) and Morroccan food (yeah, once was enough for me on this one!), and changed my hair color (numerous times)...nothing BIG! So, here I was at the end of 2008 thinking, "If 2008 was supposed to be the year of change and nothing happened, what did that make 2009 the year of?"

After much thought, I came to the conclusion that I'm not making any BIG predictions for this year. I want to continue to live life to the fullest, taking advantage of every opportunity presented to me, and maybe taking a few more risks along the way. I learned some valuable lessons in 2008, and I can honestly say that I have no regrets! There's a scene from 13 Going on 30 that I just love...Jennifer Garner's character is sitting across the table from her mom and she asks her if she could have one do-over in her life what would it be, and her mom replies nothing...I have no regrets. Jennifer Garner's character is shocked that she has no regrets and the mom says that if she didn't make the mistakes along the way she wouldn't know how to make things right. So, in 2009, I'm going to continue to live with no regrets!

A goddess is born...

I was given a nickname many years ago...The Bovine Goddess. How did that name come to be? Well, here's the story...

During my younger years (AND I'm NOT old), I became a fan of the word "heiffer". It became a descriptive word for most any moment...someone wronged me...heiffer...it was really hot...it was hotter than a heiffer in heat...you get the picture! The use of this word was amusing to most around me, so they wanted to nickname me "Queen Heiffer". I'm not a heiffer, so I quickly nipped that in the bud and told them they could call me Bovine Goddess. And THAT, my friends, is how The Bovine Goddess came to be.

I decided that for this venture, I would tweak that nickname just a bit...I've always had the gift of gab, so why not be a Gabbing Goddess??? I'm just sayin'!